A breather.
The rythm of my life
is temporarily broken.
But who's complaining.
It's been one helluva ride
these 2-plus months.
And I'm please to say,
I survived! So ha!
Listening to 기도 [Prayer].
[And as always,
if you want to see the Korean words,
please change your encoding to
Korean or Unicode.]
I think it's from the winter album.
Yeah.
Something to that effect.
Watched Forrest Gump today.
It's so cute.
And he reminds me of a little kid.
And somehow Tom Hanks manages to
pull off the part so extremely well.
I'm so confused.
I had a conversation with Yu Ting once.
And I somehow got the impression
that I would trust her more than
someone whom I have known since p5.
Don't be mistaken.
I don't mean that the person has done
anything against me.
It's just that ... she doesn't seem real to me.
I've always felt that I want to make friends
with people I can trust.
But now, I can't trust her.
Yeah.
I don't know what to do.
She's nice enough.
But I don't know what she thinks.
And I'm afraid.
The little child in me
who's afraid of the dark.
Afraid of boogeymen
hiding under the bed.
Afraid of creepy-crawlies.
has somehow evolved into one who's afraid
of backstabbers
and of people who smile at you but are thinking
that you're a shitface.
I'm afraid.
I don't know how long I can pretend before I break.
Just break and tell her what I really feel.
I really mean no harm.
I just hope that she changes her ways
so we can really be great friends.
Now, everything I say has to go through a filter.
I smile, but I reserve myself.
I can't trust her much right now.
I don't know why I pretend.
I guess I don't want to hurt her feelings.
I'm sure you know who I'm talking about, B2.
And please don't get angry.
Hear me out.
I know I bitch a lot.
And I'm always biased in my views.
But trust me on this.
I know she's really nice.
But I don't want to get hurt.
And I don't want you to either.
Please.
It could be overblown.
But it might not be.
I know I tend to judge people
prematurely.
But I've known her for longer than you have.
And this year,
I wanted to leave the vindication behind.
But it's chased me into a corner.
And..I can't let my guard down.
I know I seem like a hypocrite,
and I don't seem to be afraid.
Or even reserved.
But I am.
I asked you the other day
whether you'd be hurt if
I kept something big from you
and I didn't tell you.
I wonder if this is it.
I thank you for your friendship.
It's been a great two years.
I just wanted to tell you that,
in case anything should happen.
Yeah.
