THE FOOLISHNESS.

I know I should've expected it from
the start.
It still hurts though.
I knew it.
I knew all along that it wasn't the way
I wished it would be.

Does it always hurt this much?
To care for someone you know won't
reciprocate?
Because even when you tell yourself
that you won't have hopes.
That you won't delude yourself.
That this love you're giving,
it's for free.
You can't help but wonder,
can't help but hope that somehow or other
it's a mutual feeling.
And that's why it hurts.
That's why the pain is more than some
can bear.
I don't know what I was expecting.
But it definitely wasn't this numbness.
How foolish you are, Nicole,
to think it was anything more than it seemed.
I just wish I could have someone to blame
for my own stupidity and naivete.

I wish I could beat myself up.
I feel like crying.
But that's just plain foolishness.
Now who's going to mend my broken heart?
YOU STUPID FOOL.
WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU EXPECTING?
IT WOULD'VE BEEN A MIRACLE
FOR IT TO TURN OUT THE WAY YOU
WANTED IT TO.

Oh Nick.
You knew it from the start.
So give it up.
Why bother?
It's a dying hope.
A withering wish, my dear.

I just want to sleep now.
Sleep forever.
And get the pain out of me.
Maybe it won't hurt so much when I
stop thinking about it.
Stop deluding myself some more.
I just feel like such a loser.
shut the fcuk up already, nick.